Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Fuck this shit.

I just went to have a follow up/check up sort of thing with my Dr. uncle Mark and everything is healing up nicely, but he also gave me a pep talk about helmets and then he gave me a pep talk that was like "you gotta get your shit together and finish college, you're the only one that can crawl your way out of this hole, you'll be a better person when you help other people out and also have a job and look it isn't that hard to have an apartment and pay your bills but who do you want to be, etc etc etc" and Oh Lordy.

Of course these are things that I am already thinking, and at the start of this year more than ever I am noticing the real difference (written, spoken, conceptual/critical thinking wise, mostly, but not solely) between people who have been to college, people who have finished college, people starting out college, and me, and realizing what I am past and what I am already limited by, etc...and yeah...I'm really ready to be finished. It's just a tough decision on whether I just go for finishing up my BFA or if I still want to pursue a degree in computer science.

My dream and wish lately is that I could invent a game that teaches people to program instead of programming myself like as a programmer in general and then I'd make a bazillion dollars off a really rudimentary educational software. I guess any dream with capital is possible but you know, on the other hand I think my dream might either be stuck in the 90s or free on facebook. They really do have programming games, check it out. I'd help you find it, but you know, I'm SOOO confused from the new facebook that I can't even begin to remember where I found it from 3 facebook versions ago. Sorry, that was both mean and unfunny.

It just really always sucks to hear those sort of self regulatory reality checks from other people and it always makes me kinda want to cry afterwards. Now, excuse me while I go ignore growing up to watch TV and wait for Taylor to pick me up and go to see a movie.

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